My Ayahuasca Experience: A Six-Part Mini-Series (Part 6)

Looking out at the Pacific Ocean.

A Day of Rest

Day six was our last day at the resort before we had to leave for the airport extremely early the next morning.

This day was a much needed day of rest and relaxation, although there we participated in some woo-woo activities later in the day before dinner hour.

In the morning, we had a leisurely, relaxed breakfast, and then we strolled around the resort grounds. I think we even spotted some howler monkeys in some trees near the perimeter of the resort.

This day was also to be a three-meal day – how exciting! And, now that all ayahuasca ceremonies were complete, this meant we could resume consuming coffee! (I typically prefer espresso over coffee, but being in Costa Rica, I had some coffee and I recall it being quite nice.)

We had massages booked, which was nice and relaxing. However, I tend to prefer massages that work out the tension and knots in my muscles vs massage for the sake of relaxation, and I recall this massage as being way too gentle… so afterwards I still felt like I needed a massage! 😂

We also went down to visit Pacific ocean. It was our first and only time dong so during our stay, which was a shame considering how rarely we’re in the vicinity of such vast bodies of water. We essentially had the entire beach to ourselves by the time we made it down there, and it was simply gorgeous. I took a lot of pictures, including the one at the top of this post.

Back at the resort, we also gave the volcanic clay treatment a try. This was self-applied. After an initial rinse in the shower, we were to cover ourselves in the volcanic mud/clay, which we were to let sit on your skin and dry up after a while. Then, we were supposed to rinse it off, followed by a recommended soak in a cool pool of water before enjoying a warmer pool of water.

So, we did the above. It was an interesting experience, and it left my skin feeling nice and smooth when it was all over and done with. But one thing about that treatment is that I was not expecting the volcanic mud to smell so bad — it was extremely sulfuric!

[ Important lesson/note: If you ever do a volcanic mud bath or treatment, I recommend that you do so either naked or wearing something that you might not mind parting with afterwards. I was wearing my favorite swimming dress with a pair of bike shorts at the time. Later when I was back home, and despite giving them a very thorough rinse before running them through the wash, the volcanic ash residue that was present on my swimwear infected the entire load of laundry and made everything smell like a sulfuric volcano! I’ve since washed all those items several times in cold water (apparently hot water and using a dryer makes it worse), and I hung those items outside to dry; and although now at least the smell has significantly dissipated, it is still present in a lot of my articles of clothing. So… be warned! Don’t let this happen to you! 😂 ]

Shortly before we were all to meet outside the maloca where the ayahuasca ceremonies took place, I participated in a symbolic labyrinth. It was a relatively small labyrinth and path. (I posted a picture of it in the previous Part 5 post). When I think of the term labyrinth, I tend to think of maze; however this path was very predictable and not maze-like at all.

Before I entered the labyrinth, I picked up six stones to bring with me. As I made my way to the labyrinth’s center, I laid down a stone at each of the turning points and assigned to each stone a habit or a trait that I wished to release.

Here are the six habits or traits that I wished to release:

  • Indecision
  • Small thinking
  • Being overly concerned of what others think of me / my self-image
  • Excessive judgement (both towards self and others)
  • Procrastination
  • Defensiveness and my need to be understood

After I completed the labyrinth, I thought of six awarenesses that I would like to embrace in place of the the habits and traits that I wished to release.

These six awarenesses I wished to embrace were:

  • Trust and intuition
  • Big-picture thinking
  • Becoming action-oriented in service of love
  • Discernment
  • Alignment
  • Confidence

It felt like some of these awarenesses had already begun to show up more over the course of the last week, for which I was grateful.

After that, we participated in some type of breathing exercises, aka breathwork. Although I’ve done breathwork before, it had been the better part of a decade since I had last practiced it. I can’t say I’m a huge fan of the experience, as it tends to make me feel rather lightheaded and faint; but it does tend to have the effect of dropping down some barriers and attuning one to certain emotional truths and thoughts.

It was during the above that I had an insight come to me, or rather a reminder of an insight I believe I had had before. And that was the desire or the call to do shamanistic work of some type.

As an afterthought, I think I might rephrase this as being a leader or guide of some type of energy work or energetic healing, as I don’t wish to culturally appropriate the sacred role of shaman. But in the broader sense, I see shamanism as merely being a term for the work of bridging the gap between energy/spirit and the physical/mortal plane, and therefore I don’t believe that any one culture or system of belief can lay sole claim to that that realm. Additionally, I’ve been called to this work for about 15 years prior since developing an interest in Richard Pochinko‘s energetic work via the art of clown. Furthermore, clowning has deep historical roots in traditional shamanistic practices.

I have been contemplating whether or not to further pursue my past work in clown. I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with that part of my past. Perhaps I may be able to identify and embrace the aspects I most strongly resonate with and love; and then acknowledge and release any parts that harbor resistance, and let that go with love. ❤️

…Oh, and the other eerie frog incident that I mentioned in a previous post? I think there may have been a couple, actually. My memory is a bit hazy on the specifics, but the main incident occurred while inside our room while I was packing that night in preparation for our early departure the next morning. Suddenly, in the midst of packing, I had a strange sensation that told me to open the room door (which leads outside). I didn’t know why, but I suspected that if I did so, there’d be something there that perhaps I was meant to see. So I followed that intuitive ping and opened the door… and sitting right there on the ground, facing the door, as if waiting to be let in, was a frog.

…What?! Another frog? Are frogs supposed to be my spirit animal or something?

Here’s what one website has to say about the Symbolism of the Frog:

In general, when Frog symbolism jumps into your life, it indicates that now is a time to find opportunities in transition. In other words, the amphibian has arrived to help you swim quickly through some severe life changes. Similar to the Snake and the Butterfly spirit animals, this creature represents the creative energies of awakening and transformations. The Frog meaning also represents abundance on all levels.

Similar to the Chameleon meaning, Frog symbolism may also signal the need to enhance your intuition and strengthen your connection with the spirit world. Thus, it would be a good idea to follow your instincts and trust your gut feelings on all matters.

Alternatively, Frog symbolism is also symbolic of coming into your power. Furthermore, this is done by purifying the soul, releasing emotional baggage, and coming from a place of personal integrity. Therefore, the Frog meaning reminds you that you should make all of your choices based on what is right for you.

That basically wraps up my experiences of the week.

I have mixed feelings on the whole experience, and I’m not entirely sure if I’ll try ayahuasca again. If I do, I think I’d feel safest if I stick to very small doses, as I don’t entirely trust my physiology to be able to process and handle larger amounts in my system.

I also still feel that I have a mixed relationship with woo-woo stuff in general. Perhaps it might be best if I take my own thoughts and advice from above re: shamanism/energy work and clown: Identify and embrace the aspects I most strongly resonate with and love; and then acknowledge and release any parts that harbor resistance, and let that go with love. ❤️

Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes.
Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality.
Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.

― Lao Tzu ―

(p.s. I also noticed that I seem much more aligned and in tune with the energy of plants as a result of this journey. Since my return home, I had bought a new plant and named him Bradly. I truly sense that Bradly’s appreciates it when I talk to him and express concern, love, and care for him. In some ways, I suspect plants are further evolved than we are… at least, perhaps, in terms of their integration with a greater web of life and their interconnectedness in our universe. 🪴❤️ )

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