{"id":1795,"date":"2019-06-23T23:37:39","date_gmt":"2019-06-24T06:37:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/rachellefordyce.com\/?p=1795"},"modified":"2019-06-24T23:25:42","modified_gmt":"2019-06-25T06:25:42","slug":"creativity-transparency-courage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/rachellefordyce.com\/creative-inspiration\/2019\/06\/creativity-transparency-courage\/","title":{"rendered":"Creativity, Transparency & Courage"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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This above all: To thine own self be true. \u2013 William Shakespear … [Photo by Matthias Wagner]<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

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Next month, I’m planning to go to my hometown of Winnipeg to visit friends, family, and take in some of the Winnipeg Fringe Theatre Festival. I’m quite looking forward to it!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Being at the Fringe Threatre Festival is going to be interesting since I haven’t performed in nearly two years. I’m not exactly sure how I feel about that. When I take in live theatre, I tend to start thinking about diving into creating a new show and performing again. That said, I don’t really have a burning desire to get back on the stage again and perform. …Well, not really<\/em>, but maybe a little? It’s complicated \u2013 but I’ll try to explain what I mean. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

When I sit down and think about it, it seems to me that acting for the sake of acting and getting deep into a role has never really been, shall I say, my impetus for getting involved in theatre. I don’t think it was ever my true desire to be an actress. I just sort of fell into it, and then went along for the ride. And I’m glad I did, because I believe it to be a very important part of my life journey! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I think one of the reasons I was was whisked away by theatre was because I desired to prove to myself that it was something I was capable of. I shied away from the stage and certainly experienced varying levels of stage fright. Yet despite that, I still had a calling to be on stage. And so, I answered that call and sought to be the kind of person who would overcome that fear \u2013 or, at the very least, feel the fear and do it anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I love theatre as an art form as a whole, but I can’t say I was ever truly in love with the acting \/ performance facet more than all the other aspects of theatre. I was initially much more drawn to directing and design in addition to playwriting. Theatre was to become my preferred medium of expression by creating, producing, and performing my own independent plays.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes I find myself missing the process of creating a play and bringing it into the world, sharing it with people, and interacting with an audience. I like knowing that I’ve made an impact on someone else’s life. I’m not sure if I’ve given up on my past theatre career just yet. (Although it hasn’t really been that much of a career for the past 8 years or so, since I haven’t been deeply involved in it for quite some time.) Even so, I’m simultaneously a bit reluctant to get back into it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My last show, which I only performed in one city, was vastly underdeveloped by the time opening came around, and of course I bombed my opening performance and got a horrendous review based on that horrendous opening show. That’s been a pattern I’ve had for a while: <\/p>\n\n\n\n